You can’t make this stuff up. Well, the story does come from Fox News. If there is better proof that our current criminal justice system does an inadequate job of rehabilitating offenders, or even instilling some semblance of sanity, someone please forward it to me.
On second thought, save the policy papers and other research: I don’t have time for that, ahem, frivolous stuff.
Embattled NFL quarterback Michael Vick, facing federal charges related to his alleged participation in dogfighting, has been hit with a “$63,000,000,000 billion dollar” lawsuit filed by a South Carolina inmate who alleges the Atlanta Falcons star stole his pit bulls and sold them on eBay to buy “missiles from Iran,” FOX News has learned.
Jonathan Lee Riches filed the handwritten complaint over “theft and abuse of my animals” on July 23 in the U.S. District Court in Richmond, Va.
Riches alleges that Vick stole two white mixed pit bull dogs from his home in Holiday, Fla., and used them for dogfighting operations in Richmond, Va. The complaint goes on to allege that Vick sold the dogs on eBay and “used the proceeds to purchase missiles from the Iran government.”
The complaint also alleges that Vick would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in February of this year.
“Michael Vick has to stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes,” Riches writes in the complaint.
Riches wants $63 billion dollars “backed by gold and silver “ delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina. Riches is an inmate at the facility serving out a wire fraud conviction.
FOXNews.com attempted to contact Vick, but neither he nor his spokesman could be reached for comment.
Vick’s attorneys, meanwhile, are negotiating a plea deal with federal prosecutors before new dogfighting charges are filed next week, according to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
We trust our Minnesota Congressional delegation, including and especially John Kline and Michele Bachmann, are working on getting to the bottom of this.
